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Sex with Dr. Jess


October 12, 2012

The New Pre-Gaming: Should You Masturbate Before a Date?

Masturbate before a date?

Who doesn’t get a little nervous before a first date? Hands up please. No one? Right.

Even if you are the most charismatic, confident, good-looking person out there, you may still feel a little uncertainty in your mind. Is masturbating the new pre-date activity to help alleviate those nerves? Most of us have seen that scene from There’s Something About Mary.

All joking aside, is this a viable option to cure a case of the nervies?

Can a pre-game O help keep your mind off of sex on your date? I am highly doubtful. If you are concerned with thinking about sex the entire time on your date, I don’t think masturbation will help keep you out of the mental sheets. If you are with your date and things are progressing nicely, you are attracted to them, you probably are going to think about sex. AND THAT IS OK! We are sexual beings. Your date isn’t going to be able to read your mind and as long and you don’t whip off the table cloth and take them right there on the table, you’ll be fine.

Masturbation and orgasm have no bearing on the level of our sex drive. It’s not a situation of “if you use it, you lose it.” When we orgasm, our bodies relax and release tension in our muscles. You get an overall feeling of well being and calm. It is a completely natural activity. But also keep in mind, a simple orgasm won’t quell our sex drive completely. Just think of an orgasm as a quick, free, fun release that can help put you in a better mindset; pre-gaming. And I am not just speaking to the men. Ladies, you too can benefit from the natural, refreshing feeling from an orgasm.

Moreover, what can we take home from this? Can an orgasm help take sex off the brain? Nah. Can an orgasm help alleviate some nervousness or stress? Absolutely. So when you’re getting ready for your date, picking out your perfect outfit, and doing your hair just so, take some time for you and tap in to your built-in stress reliever. An orgasm a day can keep the nervies away, and when it comes to sex, everything is OK here.

About The Author

Dr. Megan Stubbs

Dr. Megan Stubbs is a Grand Rapids-based Sexologist. She holds a doctor of education in Human Sexuality from San Francisco’s Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality and a degree in Biology from Grand Valley State University. She also Board Certified by the American College of Sexologists (ACS).








About Dr. Jess

About Dr. Jess

Dr. Jess is a sexologist, author, international speaker and television personality. She has a PhD in human sexuality and travels the globe to promote deliciously pleasurable sex. From hosting Playboy TV’s SWING to running workshops for couples’ in the Caribbean, she relishes in every moment! Check out her tour schedule here.